Coping with uncertainty (17/06/20)

 

We are now three months into the Covid-19 pandemic, and whilst lockdown restrictions are lifting, there is still a real sense of uncertainty lingering and the situation has highlighted that we can never quite predict what is around the corner in life. We are also likely to be feeling run down and burned out at this point in the pandemic, as we take stock of what has happened over the past three months and our fight or flight mode response begins to ease. It is really important at this time that we check in with the experience of uncertainty and how it can affect our mental health.

Uncertainty feels uncomfortable and it is easy to fall into patterns of behaviour that make us feel as if we are in control and that numb the discomfort we are feeling. Brene Brown calls this our ‘vulnerability armour’. Examples of this might be excessively seeking reassurance from others about decisions, taking on more tasks at home or work to busy yourself, delaying making tough decisions, avoiding situations, repeatedly checking things, overeating, drinking alcohol, scrolling social media, online shopping and perhaps the most poignant: foreboding joy. Because we also feel vulnerable when we are experiencing joy, we can start to numb the good experiences in our lives as well as the negative. In this short video, Brene explains a bit more about this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ht5dDInnTzM

Although these numbing behaviours may feel like a comfort at the time, they enable us to shut down emotion and overload our senses which can lead to burnout, stress, anxiety and even depression. Here are some positive steps that you can take to manage your numbing responses to uncertainty:

Be aware of your sensory input. Reduce the amount of social media and news that you are consuming. Information overload can lead to increased stress and worry.

Talk about how you are feeling and listen to others. Empathy (feeling listened to and understood) is one of best antidotes to vulnerability.

Be aware of your go-to numbing behaviours (your armour). When you notice them, allow yourself to feel vulnerability. Try to understand why you are feeling vulnerable rather than shutting the feelings down.

Focus on the present. There is a lot that is beyond our control at the moment. Focus on your immediate situation and concentrate your energy on what you can change and affect. Practicing mindfulness can really help with this: https://www.helpguide.org/harvard/benefits-of-mindfulness.htm

Self-care. Make time for exercise and avoid sugary and processed foods and excessive alcohol consumption. Get outdoors when you can. Make time for relaxation practices such as meditation, yoga or deep breathing. You could try this meditation focusing specifically on coping with uncertainty: https://www.helpguide.org/meditations/coping-with-uncertainty-meditation.htm

Gratitude. The best antidote to foreboding joy. Try writing down three things that you are grateful for at the start of each day. Research has shown that gratitude practice can lead to increased happiness. You can read more about this here: https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/giving-thanks-can-make-you-happier

I hope you find this helpful. If you are struggling to cope at the moment, you can access counselling support from the University: https://www.salford.ac.uk/askus/our-services/wellbeing-and-counselling/counselling

Take care and keep well!

References

Brown, B (2012). Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead. New York: Gotham Books.

Robinson L & Smith M (2020). Dealing with uncertainty during the coronavirus pandemic: https://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/dealing-with-uncertainty.htm